Greetings from Ishpeming, Michigan.... from whence I come.
It has been a long trek home, but 100% worth it to have my parents, my sister, and I under the same roof for the first time in two years. I flew to Pittsburgh Monday and spent two days driving home with my sister. I'm so very lucky to be home this year, but can't help but think of what next Christmas will be like.
As you have no doubt guessed from my previous posts, I had serious doubts about continuing to pursue my Peace Corps dream. After many conversations with good friends and many restless nights, I have decided to keep on. I am hoping to hear about placement very soon. I got an e-mail from the placement office in D.C. several weeks back asking that I send my transcripts ASAP after my master's degree posts and to send a résumé. Hopefully I will hear soon. I think it's the not knowing where you'll be living in six months that is most stressful.
Explaining the Peace Corps and why you want to do it is increasingly difficult. I know that I'm getting a highly specialized degree that I won't be using (directly anyway) for a couple of years. I know that I could probably get into a good PhD program. I know that I could get a nice cushy teaching job in the suburbs somewhere. So what. Life is too short and I've pushed myself too hard and I'm too tired. I think if I take another teaching job that I'll end up leaving choral music sooner than later. Two years doing something different will be refreshing.
I also don't have silly illusions that joining the Peace Corps and living in a mud hut will fix all my problems.... or that I'll magically find myself. I do know that there is something about the African sense of community that I need to learn. Something about the transparency with which Africans relate that I want to absorb. Something about living life day to day that I want to know.
So I proceed. But first, I will enjoy this day playing cards and eating with my family. I know that the next Christmas like this I have will be very different.
Happy Holidays, all. May we all find what we seek in 2011.
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Sunday, November 28, 2010
too many questions. few answers. time speeding away.
Update: I received my legal clearance last week and it seems from my communication with the D.C. Peace Corps headquarters that my file is being pushed through to the placement office. They're asking that I send my NAU transcripts showing my posted master's degree ASAP and I need to send a résumé this week.
I am extremely anxious about where I will be placed. I just want to know.
I won't lie, it's been a very rough few weeks. I've been having many second thoughts about going to the Peace Corps at all. I ran into a friend in the grocery store a few weeks ago and we were talking about how in your career timing is everything...
I am putting myself in a position to make a big career move, and I keep wondering if I will have the same opportunities and momentum after two years abroad and away from the choral world. I wonder if it will look bad or strange on a résumé that I took off for two years and didn't do anything with my master's degree.
I think back to the summer and I was so absolutely sure about my decision to go... and I wonder where those feelings went. I wonder how I felt so sure and how I now feel so unsure sometimes.
As the days draw on, however, I am finding that spark again. I watched a video from my trip to South Africa on Thanksgiving and I was transported back to how I felt while I was there. How the African people inspired me more than I can remember... I remember waking up in Africa last May and thinking about how a beautiful symbiotic relationship was possible-- that I could help people who need help, and how I can learn from this African culture. Learn how to not be so wrapped up in work, study, the next concert, the next career move... Learn to be connected to people without cell phones, laptops, and Facebook. Learn to just be. Just be me. Just take a minute and live.
http://allafrica.com/stories/201011170631.html
So, I still worry. I still stress about perhaps being placed in an intolerant place. I worry about having to pretend to be someone I'm not for two years. The story above is heartbreaking, and typical of many stories I've been reading over the last several months.
As the holiday season hits, and I prepare to participate in many concerts and performances, I think of waking up on Christmas of 2011 in a mud hut somewhere in the African bush. Scary. Exciting.
This picture inspires me. Look at these beautiful children. This was taken after the church service we sang at near Sun City, South Africa. This could be my daily life very soon!
I am extremely anxious about where I will be placed. I just want to know.
I won't lie, it's been a very rough few weeks. I've been having many second thoughts about going to the Peace Corps at all. I ran into a friend in the grocery store a few weeks ago and we were talking about how in your career timing is everything...
I am putting myself in a position to make a big career move, and I keep wondering if I will have the same opportunities and momentum after two years abroad and away from the choral world. I wonder if it will look bad or strange on a résumé that I took off for two years and didn't do anything with my master's degree.
I think back to the summer and I was so absolutely sure about my decision to go... and I wonder where those feelings went. I wonder how I felt so sure and how I now feel so unsure sometimes.
As the days draw on, however, I am finding that spark again. I watched a video from my trip to South Africa on Thanksgiving and I was transported back to how I felt while I was there. How the African people inspired me more than I can remember... I remember waking up in Africa last May and thinking about how a beautiful symbiotic relationship was possible-- that I could help people who need help, and how I can learn from this African culture. Learn how to not be so wrapped up in work, study, the next concert, the next career move... Learn to be connected to people without cell phones, laptops, and Facebook. Learn to just be. Just be me. Just take a minute and live.
http://allafrica.com/stories/201011170631.html
So, I still worry. I still stress about perhaps being placed in an intolerant place. I worry about having to pretend to be someone I'm not for two years. The story above is heartbreaking, and typical of many stories I've been reading over the last several months.
As the holiday season hits, and I prepare to participate in many concerts and performances, I think of waking up on Christmas of 2011 in a mud hut somewhere in the African bush. Scary. Exciting.
This picture inspires me. Look at these beautiful children. This was taken after the church service we sang at near Sun City, South Africa. This could be my daily life very soon!
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
medical paperwork sent... again
A couple weeks after I mailed my medical packet to the Peace Corps office in D.C. I got an email saying that I didn't have a totally compete packet. The doctor forgot to check one box on the medical history form and I was in need of a Polio vaccine. I got my shot last Friday (10-15) and faxed my paperwork to D.C. My medical stuff will be evaluated by a Peace Corps nurse. If that all clears, then my file goes through a legal review, and it would be after that point that I'd get an invitation to a specific country.
This is all starting to feel very real and I won't lie, I'm very scared some days. Last week some construction workers hit the water line into the NAU music building, and we had to use the facilities in the library (the building next door). I caught myself thinking what an inconvenience this was, then realized how spoiled I've become. In eight short months, I'll most likely be living somewhere without running water or electricity. Oh how my perspective needs to change in such a short time.
I worry how soon my departure is coming up. I will have but two weeks after graduation from NAU to get ready to leave for my Peace Corps service. The response among my friends and colleagues about me going to Africa is still mixed.... but this decision can't be about other people. I will come back a different person and a better conductor.... and I can't not go because I'm afraid it's going to be difficult.
Again, I wait.
This is all starting to feel very real and I won't lie, I'm very scared some days. Last week some construction workers hit the water line into the NAU music building, and we had to use the facilities in the library (the building next door). I caught myself thinking what an inconvenience this was, then realized how spoiled I've become. In eight short months, I'll most likely be living somewhere without running water or electricity. Oh how my perspective needs to change in such a short time.
I worry how soon my departure is coming up. I will have but two weeks after graduation from NAU to get ready to leave for my Peace Corps service. The response among my friends and colleagues about me going to Africa is still mixed.... but this decision can't be about other people. I will come back a different person and a better conductor.... and I can't not go because I'm afraid it's going to be difficult.
Again, I wait.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
medical paperwork sent... finally
The medical checkup procedure was far less of a hassle that I'd expected. Last Friday (9/10) I had an appointment with a nurse at the NAU health center. She did some basic eye/ear tests, recorded my height/weight, etc, gave me a TB test, and ordered all the labs I needed; I then had seven viles of blood drawn.
Yesterday I had my apppointment with the doctor, who herself was a Peace Corps volunteer in Fiji! She went over my lab results, did a basic exam, and filled out all the paperwork. Putting that envelope in the mail is exciting and scary all at once. It makes this feel more real.
Peace Corps service is so very much the polar opposite of my real life now. I spend my days in an air conditioned building thinking about choral music, balanced chords, when Vivaldi's op. 3 was published, and the differences between composers who lived 500 years ago. I hope that I can make that big adjustment.
So, now I wait.
Yesterday I had my apppointment with the doctor, who herself was a Peace Corps volunteer in Fiji! She went over my lab results, did a basic exam, and filled out all the paperwork. Putting that envelope in the mail is exciting and scary all at once. It makes this feel more real.
Peace Corps service is so very much the polar opposite of my real life now. I spend my days in an air conditioned building thinking about choral music, balanced chords, when Vivaldi's op. 3 was published, and the differences between composers who lived 500 years ago. I hope that I can make that big adjustment.
So, now I wait.
Saturday, August 28, 2010
medical clearance. (which shall not bring me down), part II
It may be easier to break into Fort Knox than to get immunization records from my former HMO in California.
Saturday, August 14, 2010
medical clearance. (which shall not bring me down)
I received my Peace Corps medical clearance packet on Monday, August 9. It's a lot of paperwork to be sure.
In the packet is information about a group of dentists who have all agreed to give free dental exams to Peace Corps applicants. Terrific! I called the office on Wednesday morning and the woman asks if I can come in right away. Why not, I think.
So I go in for my exam, and I'm fulling expecting everything to check out fine (I floss twice a day most days). Of course, I need seven cavities filled. SEVEN. Panic sets in. I have no dental insurance of any kind. The long and short of this story is that after three hours in the chair and $1,400, I've no more cavities.
I have my eye exam Monday and am awaiting immunization records from my pediatrician in Michigan and my HMO in California before heading to the NAU health center for my medical exam.
Though all this has been trying, my spirits are not wavering. I'm surer everyday that this is the correct next step for me.
...and I'm flossing and brushing like a freakin' fiend.
In the packet is information about a group of dentists who have all agreed to give free dental exams to Peace Corps applicants. Terrific! I called the office on Wednesday morning and the woman asks if I can come in right away. Why not, I think.
So I go in for my exam, and I'm fulling expecting everything to check out fine (I floss twice a day most days). Of course, I need seven cavities filled. SEVEN. Panic sets in. I have no dental insurance of any kind. The long and short of this story is that after three hours in the chair and $1,400, I've no more cavities.
I have my eye exam Monday and am awaiting immunization records from my pediatrician in Michigan and my HMO in California before heading to the NAU health center for my medical exam.
Though all this has been trying, my spirits are not wavering. I'm surer everyday that this is the correct next step for me.
...and I'm flossing and brushing like a freakin' fiend.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
nomination!
I got word this morning that I've been nominated for Peace Corps service. Let me explain how the Peace Corps application/vetting process works so this will be more clear:
1. Initial online application, essays, and medical questionnaire
2. Interview with a Peace Corps recruiter
3. Nomination (which simply means the process continues)
4. Medical/Dental/Optical review; legal review
5. Invitation (this is where you get a depature date, city/country, job title, etc.)
So although this is an amazing step, I still don't have many specifics. I'm going to see if my recruiter knows which coninent/region I'm going to...
I am working on waiting with confidence and patience while this process continues. It takes a long time, I know this. I will post more info. as soon as I know it!
1. Initial online application, essays, and medical questionnaire
2. Interview with a Peace Corps recruiter
3. Nomination (which simply means the process continues)
4. Medical/Dental/Optical review; legal review
5. Invitation (this is where you get a depature date, city/country, job title, etc.)
So although this is an amazing step, I still don't have many specifics. I'm going to see if my recruiter knows which coninent/region I'm going to...
I am working on waiting with confidence and patience while this process continues. It takes a long time, I know this. I will post more info. as soon as I know it!
Friday, July 30, 2010
to set the record straight...
YES, I'm finish grad. school before I go into the Peace Corps... people keep asking.
Coming to NAU has been a great opportunity. It's a uniquely designed master's program which provides lots of hands-on conducting experience. I am really excited to be conducting the NAU Men's Chorale this year, a combination of freshman vocal/music ed. majors, upper-class music majors, and non-majors.
I've been thinking a lot about the career of a choral conductor. At some level, a lot of being a success is marketing and selling yourself. It's all about what (and who) is in your bio, who you've worked with, which ensembles you've sung with... it gets overwhelmingly superficial sometimes. I think sometimes it becomes more about these superficial elements than about the music.
No word on my nomination yet... I'm patiently(?) waiting.
Coming to NAU has been a great opportunity. It's a uniquely designed master's program which provides lots of hands-on conducting experience. I am really excited to be conducting the NAU Men's Chorale this year, a combination of freshman vocal/music ed. majors, upper-class music majors, and non-majors.
I've been thinking a lot about the career of a choral conductor. At some level, a lot of being a success is marketing and selling yourself. It's all about what (and who) is in your bio, who you've worked with, which ensembles you've sung with... it gets overwhelmingly superficial sometimes. I think sometimes it becomes more about these superficial elements than about the music.
No word on my nomination yet... I'm patiently(?) waiting.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
P.S.
The title of this blog comes from a portion of Shakespeare's As You Like It which continually inspires me:
Sweet are the uses of adversity,
Which, like the toad, ugly and venomous,
Wears yet a precious jewel in his head;
And this our life, exempt from public haunt,
Finds tongues in trees, books in the running brooks,
Sermons in stones, and good in everything.
--As You Like It, II. i. 12
Sweet are the uses of adversity,
Which, like the toad, ugly and venomous,
Wears yet a precious jewel in his head;
And this our life, exempt from public haunt,
Finds tongues in trees, books in the running brooks,
Sermons in stones, and good in everything.
--As You Like It, II. i. 12
the beginning of a very long journey
Perhaps it's too early to create a Peace Corps blog. Time will tell.
I am currently in the process of trying to become a Peace Corps volunteer beginning summer 2011. I am currently a graduate student at Northern Arizona University (Flagstaff) where I'm doing a degree in choral conducting.
Peace Corps progress:
Application submitted June 15, 2010
Peace Corps interview June 28, 2010
Many pieces of paperwork later, I am awaiting a nomination (a month, job, and continent assignment). From there I go through medical, dental and eye exams and then await a specific country assisgnment and exact date of departure.
I find myself constantly trying to wrap my mind around what Peace Corps service will be like. I've been reading a lot of other Peace Corps blogs and reading through the material from my recruiter, but I can't seem to wrap my mind around what day-to-day life would be like. I am hoping to teach English (secondary) somewhere in Africa. The African continent has long captured my imagination and interest, but after touring South Africa with the NAU Shrine of the Ages Choir in May 2010, I can't seem to shake the feeling that there's much more on the continent for me to do/explore. I have never in my life met such vibrant, alive, amazing people.... I have have also never seen such abject poverty.
So... I wait. I wait for a nomination and I continue to put myself in a mindset of giving and letting go of the day-to-day material things which currently occupy my space and time.
I am currently in the process of trying to become a Peace Corps volunteer beginning summer 2011. I am currently a graduate student at Northern Arizona University (Flagstaff) where I'm doing a degree in choral conducting.
Peace Corps progress:
Application submitted June 15, 2010
Peace Corps interview June 28, 2010
Many pieces of paperwork later, I am awaiting a nomination (a month, job, and continent assignment). From there I go through medical, dental and eye exams and then await a specific country assisgnment and exact date of departure.
I find myself constantly trying to wrap my mind around what Peace Corps service will be like. I've been reading a lot of other Peace Corps blogs and reading through the material from my recruiter, but I can't seem to wrap my mind around what day-to-day life would be like. I am hoping to teach English (secondary) somewhere in Africa. The African continent has long captured my imagination and interest, but after touring South Africa with the NAU Shrine of the Ages Choir in May 2010, I can't seem to shake the feeling that there's much more on the continent for me to do/explore. I have never in my life met such vibrant, alive, amazing people.... I have have also never seen such abject poverty.
So... I wait. I wait for a nomination and I continue to put myself in a mindset of giving and letting go of the day-to-day material things which currently occupy my space and time.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)